An Open Letter to the Powers that Be.

from an SBC woman with nothing to lose.

Dr. Barber,

            I hope this open letter finds you well. You do not know me, but I’m just a regular woman. An average SBC congregant. Recently you shared on twitter that you were willing to listen to respectful dialogue regarding the recent amendment concerning women in ministry. Following the CNN piece that was released yesterday about Fern Creek, I am writing to advocate for the importance of women serving in a shepherding capacity and express my concern over the amendment that was added earlier this year. Truthfully, watching that piece felt like salt in a wound. I watched the results live from home, and every day I wake up and pray over next year’s meeting. I’m not hopeful for a favorable outcome. but I pray. And I pray for my sisters in ministry, that they would be encouraged and strengthened. I pray for my own pastor, because I love him and my church family dearly. I don’t have a platform or a microphone or anything that I could gain or lose by you listening to what I have to say. I’m not on staff at a church, nor is my spouse. Noone in our family has a counter witnessing clause in their contract. My seminary is interdenominational. My husband isn’t an elder. And I realize that at this point, even putting this out into the world is likely a futile attempt, but I know I’d be heartbroken if I didn’t say something.

            First, I’d like to thank you for your leadership. We appreciate your service and commitment to the mission and purpose of the local church. My husband and I have been members of our Southern Baptist affiliated church for over 10 years. We have four young children, all of whom deal with various disabilities and chronic health needs. Over the years we’ve spent countless nights in the hospital caring for our children, but our church family carried us through. Throughout our numerous hospital stays we’ve never once needed to ask for a meal or a change of clothes. Our people have shown up for us over and over as the hands and feet of Christ. As you might have guessed, all of our pastors are the most incredible humans, and our whole church is one big family. Three years ago, the Lord called me to attend seminary, and our pastors on staff were so supportive. At the time I didn’t know why, I was just operating out of obedience. I thought perhaps that I would write a book or start a nonprofit, but as I’ve spent a good chunk of my time reading commentaries and writing seminary papers sprawled out on the floor my children’s PICU rooms in between rounds, the Lord has made my assignment clear: pediatric hospital chaplaincy.

            In between surgeries and regular specialist appointments, my children receive therapy and treatment just about every week. And every time we visit our local children’s hospital, I stop by the interfaith chapel and pray over the pages in the prayer book. Gosh I love to pray. You would not believe the amount of heartache on some of these pages, but I realized after several visits that even though this is an interfaith space, the name of Jesus was on every single page. I’m convinced that for these families, having a representative of the Christian faith in these moments of crisis is more important than ever. I also recently realized how many years it took me to set foot in the hospital chapel for the first time as a parent of a patient. That room is somber. It’s scary. These people need the love and tenderness of Christ embodied. That is my goal: to care for the spiritual needs of patients and hospital staff with the love of Christ from a place of deep solidarity.

            Currently I am in the top of my class at my evangelical seminary and am working towards my MA in chaplaincy and care ministry. This degree is 79 credit hours, so 1/3 of my degree is systematic theology, 1/3 is bible exposition, and 1/3 is counseling and chaplaincy related courses. I affirm my seminary’s recently updated position on women in ministry (which supports women’s ordination in a limited capacity), as well as the BFM2K, but in order to best serve my patients and their families, I am seeking ordination for the work I will do in a clinical setting.

I am well aware that there is a secondary difference of opinion here amongst some American saints. I know the arguments backwards and forwards, in Greek and in English. But the most requested service in this ministry context is baptism, and in order to baptize believers at the hospital, ordination is required. Because of the recent amendment, my current church would not be allowed to support my ordination without risking disfellowship. I am not asking them to choose between you and I. They have done too much for us. So, I am appealing to you on my own behalf, even though I anticipate rejection. I am not pursuing ordination so that I can have a title or authority. I am pursuing ordination so that I can serve God obediently, and aid patients in participating in one of the most important ordinances of the church. And I am speaking up because I don’t think the men in the room have thought through the wide-reaching unintended consequences of such vague verbiage, because there are SO many women like me.

            I am not interested in a mic, though I cheer on my sisters. I don’t want to preach, though I support my sisters that do. I dislike pulpits, but I’m eager to hear wisdom from women. But many of us are trying to convince y’all that “pastor” cannot be reduced to an authoritarian title or a preaching role. To pastor is to shepherd one another towards our shared Good Shepherd— men and women, brothers, and sisters with or without authority. I take seriously my fidelity to scripture, responsible hermeneutical interpretation, and what it means to belong to the priesthood of saints; but I am also cognizant of the biblical fact that because of Christ’s supremacy as illuminated in scripture, all believers, even pastors, remain spiritual sheep. Christ is the Good Shepherd. And when it is all said and done, scripture doesn’t say pastors will be pastors for all of eternity, but that our eschatological destiny is siblinghood in the family of God, and sons & daughters of the Father. For this reason, I believe that elevating an earthly assignment to the level of identity, completely undermines our eschatological identity as people of the promise, resulting in idolatry of power, requiring repentance.

            The ramifications of this amendment are not merely wide reaching, they are working in opposition of the great commission & great commandment at the expense of your own sisters in the faith. Truthfully, most women I know cannot risk speaking up. Their husbands are pastors, elders, worship leaders, and staff members with counter witnessing clauses built into their contracts. But so many women in the SBC are heartbroken. Please hear that. So many of us feel dehumanized by being perpetually reduced to our gender because of the rampant obsession with power and leadership. We feel silenced. We feel small because of the ways in which our brothers have stewarded these conversations. We don’t feel safe participating in the discourse. We see the rampant abuses of power and the treatment of survivors in particular and wonder why it is we, your fellow sisters and ministers of the gospel that are such a threat? We love our home churches and the pastors that shepherd us. We delight in submitting to them, but we are soured by the stain of the convention.

My church’s great hall is adorned with purple banners that read “You belong here.” And while I recognize that there may or may not be room for a woman like me in the earthly SBC, my fellow female chaplains and I nevertheless belong to the eternal ecumenical family of the resurrected Messiah. Gosh, that belonging is such good news. Following the expulsions earlier this year, other organizations and other denominations have gone out of their way to affirm and support their sisters because of their fidelity to scripture. Similarly other churches have left the SBC on their own, again, because they take scripture seriously.

            Dr. Barber, I am called by the Spirit of God to come alongside and care for the most vulnerable in their deepest time of need, and with all the respect in the world, these patients and their fragile faith can’t wait while a bunch of men bicker on their blogs and attempt to contain the infinite Spirit of the living God. This decision will likely solidify your presidential legacy. I am not writing to change your mind. I am writing so that 10, 50, or 100 years down the road you can’t say you didn’t know about women like me.

             While I am of course open to discussing this further, I understand you’ve got a full plate. Regardless, I am your sister in ministry. My goal is not to challenge your leadership or authority, but to contribute to the betterment of the ministry. I am your sister in Christ for all eternity. So is Linda. And gosh am I grateful for her courage and example. I am committed to wielding gospel truth and resurrection hope in a broken world with urgency & obedience to the Spirit of God. I hope that of all people, you can understand that. Praying for you, my brother.

Warmly,

Liz Daye