Writers Don't Need Networks

We Need Friendship

Two years ago I attended the Festival of Faith and Writing as a seminary student with my beloved Dr. G. I was there to soak in gorgeous writing and immerse myself in poetry and prose. But I was also there to study the industry. I had homework from my professor and homework from my literary agent. The only problem? I felt like a fish out of water. At the time I was an agented aspiring author. I knew I wanted to take my time and get closer to finishing seminary before taking my proposal on submission, but I really didn’t know the inner workings of the publishing industry.

The thing that makes Calvin so special is that the festival is a haven for writers and authors of all kinds. It’s not just a Christian conference; it’s an interfaith gathering of wordy weirdos. And yes, everyone whose anyone in faith-based publishing is here too. Agents, publishers, marketers, publicists, editors, and executives. Everyone’s here.

So why did I return this year? Truthfully, it wasn’t just business. Yes, I got to meet with my teams at NavPress and Brazos— but that was a happy bonus. I came because I needed to be close to my safe people. I needed to spend time in person with my emotional support co-author, my friends, and my writing group. I wasn’t here to put on a show. I came to Calvin to be around people that I could safely unmask around free of judgement.

Camden Morgante, Jenn Schultz, Christy Lynne Wood, Alisha Roth, me, & Kate Boyd

Over the years I’ve learned to recognize what masking does to my body as an autistic woman. The performance takes a physical toll. It hurts. So, I decided to let myself be myself around my safe people. I dropped the mask. And being able to do that in community nourished me emotionally and spiritually. At one point, my dear friend Jenai Auman jested about my “Liz-isms.” My stims and quirks that I typically hide or silence in public (if I can help it). And I realized that being myself in public isn’t so scary when my primary circle is safe. There were times we sat together in silence, times that I lost my words mid-sentence— but my friends found them for me. For autistic people, low support doesn’t mean no support. But what a gift to feel supported. Amen?

I was sharing a bit with Dr.G’s students in the airport about why I chose to come back, and why Calvin is so special. And the reason is because writers need friends.

Let’s talk about it.

I truthfully do not know a single author who has released a book recently that wasn’t accompanied by an intense amount of burnout. Birthing a book into the world takes a major toll.

See, the point of going to places like the Festival of Faith and Writing isn’t to brush elbows with potential endorsers or brown nose publishers. It’s to be a friend and meet friends. It’s to widen the circle and help more folks feel safe enough to feel fully human. It’s to cheer one another on without strings.

It’s no secret that a whole bunch of Christian authors built massive brands on the backs of others. They used the algorithm for personal gain and said it was for God. They build a following and lost their prophetic voice in the process. But we can do things differently.

Why do writers need a support system? Because this whole industry is fickle. Things shift and change. But most importantly because accountability and friendship is much more important than networking and business relationships.

Morgan Strehlow, Kate Boyd, me, and Jenai Auman

So, here’s what I’ve learned over the years navigating the industry as a newbie:

Don’t pay for friends

Do writers deserve to get paid for their skill and expertise? YES. Especially when a gendered pay gap for women writers is glaring. Still, I have been very hesitant to “join” groups that charge a fee for my belonging and promise friendship. Maybe it’s my millennial MLM trauma. There’s something so slimy about going to a party and feeling pressured to buy something. Similarly, I struggle with the idea of paying money to a quasi-public figure and hoping for friendship.

There’s a felt need there. Writers need support in the writing process. One of the things I respect most about my co-author, Kate, is the way that she made space for authors, professors, academics, and creatives to do co-working together— free of charge. Writing can be lonely. Friends help. :) It’s not rocket science. If we want to make this industry healthier for future writers, we need to look for creative ways to make space, practice hospitality, and love our readers well by first loving one another well. Often as writers we write from a place of pain, and hope that our readers might relate. But we love our readers best by writing from a place of emotional health and wholeness. Writing to heal and writing to publish aren’t always the same thing. Recognizing the difference and committing to heal in community is one way that we can leave our mark on the industry for future readers and writers.

Find cheerleaders not competitors

Speaking of leaving our mark, nothing kills creativity quite like competition. Nothing poisons possibility more than a scarcity mentality. Find friends who are committed to your flourishing. Reject competition, jealousy, and envy. Name them when they show up and release them. Instead of measuring people by book deals and dollars, look for safe friends.

It’s no secret that this year has been a beast for our family. My close friends and my writer group have been some of my biggest sources of encouragement while my husband spend over four months looking for work. But one of my favorite moments at the festival was when my husband called to share that he got a new job FINALLY (YAY!!!) and I got to celebrate with the people who have been my source of strength. I joked that since I was with Beth Felker Jones when we found out about the terrible horrible no good very bad news, and I was with Beth AGAIN when we got the GOOD news, that her presence felt like a God-wink, bookending that period with a sense of peace & providence. There were also a few IVP higher ups that randomly joined in our spontaneous celebration. That was a lovely reminder for me that publishing people aren’t literary gatekeepers, they’re humans looking for human connection too. They love a good celebration— a good reason to party.

My husband starts his new job on Monday and I’m so proud of him. :)

It’s been a challenging season, but I’m grateful to move forward.

Practice literary citizenship

Lastly, I suggest trading capitalistic concepts like networking (gross) for literary citizenship, a phrase my agent Morgan Strehlow loves. Be the kind of reader and writer that you too want to experience. Hype others up from a place of authenticity. Champion work you believe in. Be a safe friend. Make space for grace. Practice empathy.

I knew going in that writing books would be hard work. I could not imagine going through all of the steps without people that I could vent to, cry to, inquire of, and wonder with. I feel a sense of responsibility to pay it forward. My agent’s substack is appropriately named Writing is a Team Sport, but there are no opponents in this game. It’s flag football and the scoreboard is off. There’s more giggling than tackling. We celebrate the face paint and matching shirts. Penalties are replaced with grace. We’re all looking forward to the postgame snacks.

Our readers don’t want to see authors as winners and losers— they want to read beautiful words. They want to champion our stories, not pit us against one another. We shouldn’t do that to one another either.

Who knows, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe it’s my inner enneagram nine talking. I’m not great at sports metaphors which is why I wrote a super serious theology book that talks about friendship bracelets, millennial movies, and the beach. That said, I’m still down for matching shirts. Who is in?

---

Updates:

So, this week in book writing news I’ve begun the hauntingly humiliating task of requesting endorsements for book one. Isn’t that wild? I’m *floored* by the responses I’ve gotten so far and I’m excited to hear what my colleagues think!

Next week is my last week at the hospital before taking a short break over the summer to finish the David book and take care of the kids in between paragraphs. I anticipate a fair amount of poolside editing in my future. I look forward to returning to my patients and our incredible team in the fall. 😊

I also expect to spend most of May on the phone with DME suppliers and getting our new insurance squared away. Talk about the BIGGEST relief.

This week on the I Read Something Bad Podcast we’re talking Quicksilver by Callie Hart. Hop over for our takes on the theological importance of literary worldbuilding, what happens when people misuse power for personal gain, and what Kingfisher’s relationship with the quicksilver can teach us about longsuffering (and more!)

If you find yourself navigating the peculiar world of publishing, what questions remain?

How are you writing from a place of healing and wholeness?

How are you processing pain on the page?

How are you loving your readers with your words and your work?

How are you championing others without strings?

Feel free to keep the conversation going in the comments. <3

Know I’m cheering you on and inviting you in.

Be well, beloveds.